tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-84996805196549925812024-03-13T12:11:33.721-07:00Cliff's Little Corner of the WebI'm a follower of Christ, and while I don't know much, I do know that our God is GOOD - Our God is FAITHFUL - Our God is SOVEREIGN.Cliff Careyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01760846253223848519noreply@blogger.comBlogger91125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8499680519654992581.post-51248377950566444902019-12-19T22:46:00.000-08:002019-12-19T22:46:27.892-08:004 Months HomeEmilia has been a part of our family now for right about 4 1/2 months and oh how she has come into her own. Here are a few pictures:<div>
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Cliff Careyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01760846253223848519noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8499680519654992581.post-88661518477741879732019-07-16T06:52:00.000-07:002019-07-16T06:52:15.925-07:00Days 7-13 ~ July 10-16 ~ Getting to Know EmiliaGreetings on a Tuesday evening from Guangzhou.<br />
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It's hard to explain (or even personally digest) the last week here in China - and especially all the excitement and emotion that came with receiving our new daughter. I suppose the best way to summarize this last week is to describe it as a time of <b><i>settling in</i></b>.<br />
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After receiving Emilia last Monday and officially adopting her Tuesday, the next phase has had many layers to it. I'd call the first layer <b><i>Surviving the Trauma.</i></b> This sounds ominous and I suppose it is. This girl has gone through all kinds of trauma.<br />
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First, there's <u>the trauma of becoming an orphan</u>. We won't be sharing with very many people the details of how she became an orphan. This will be part of HER STORY, and will be HERS to disseminate over many years time. We’ll tell her the story at the appropriate time along the way and let her tell others when she feels safe doing so.<br />
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Next, there’s <u>the trauma of being removed from her caregivers</u>. These people have loved and cared for her for the last several months, and she is connected to them. We literally took her right out of their arms. That was traumatic.<br />
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Then there’s <u>the trauma of having strange looking people who talk funny feed her weird food</u>.<br />
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<b><i><u>And so much more...</u></i></b> So much trauma for a 15 month old to handle. And with all of this we have begun to understand the shock she is in. She has basically been in survival mode, and that meant we weren’t seeing the little girl we had seen in the pictures and videos over the last three months. The laughs and giggles. The interactions with her caregivers. Hardly any of it. There were times when I wondered if they’d given us a different girl and didn’t tell us. We’d wonder if and when we’d ever get to see a smile.<br />
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While we were in Nanchang we got to know another couple (Jeremy & Elsie) who were adopting their second daughter from China. Jeremy encouraged me with a little piece of wisdom when I was wondering if Emilia would ever connect with me; being that connection is going to be slow for these kids, maybe about 3% per day, but when you put all of that in perspective, you can see transformation in a little over a month. So we set our expectations low and just focused in on loving Emilia right where she was.<br />
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Hanging out at the train station</td></tr>
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In my last post I mentioned how she was bonding with both of us. Well... that quickly came to an end after Day 2. Suddenly she decided that I was the only one that she wanted to be with, and when I say that, I mean literally 24/7. She refused to be held by April and would scream if I ever set her down, even for five seconds. For the last week she’s been Daddy’s girl. You can imagine how hard this is for Mom. You pour all your love and every bit of energy and emotion into this child and they basically reject you. We had been warned a while back that this could be a possibility, but it’s still hard to take in while it’s happening. But remember... 3% progress per day. As I write this post, she let April carry her and hold her yesterday and today. April has fed her, and was even able to sleep with her the night before last. A little progress is happening every day. We’re praying that by tomorrow night, when we have a 12 hour flight, that she’ll be able to be held by either of us for extended periods of the flight.<br />
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Don't judge us. There's no such thing as a car seat in China.</td></tr>
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Letting mom give her breakfast yesterday.</td></tr>
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Walking back after dinner last night just<br />leaning into her momma.</td></tr>
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Adopting Emilia has been one of the most amazing things ever for April and me... but it's also fun to see how it's been for Peter. He has been such a champ on this trip. He's been flexible, has learned a ton about China, and has basically been a fun mini-adult to have along. It's been cool to watch him love his new sister unconditionally and be okay when she rejects him. We truly think he will carry the memories of this experience with him for a lifetime and that it will make him a great big brother to this beautiful little girl.<br />
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Peter at the White Swan Hotel standing in front of<br />a ship carved from a single slab of jade.</td></tr>
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Peter the photographer</td></tr>
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">"Carbing up" for the day.</td></tr>
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Getting fitted in some<br />traditional Chinese garb.</td></tr>
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As I've previously mentioned, the process of adopting a child from China is a straight-forward one, After the adoption is finalized in her home province, the final part of the process involves obtaining her visa from the U.S. Consulate here in Guangzhou. Our visa interview was yesterday (Monday,) and we had the privilege of joining two other families. It was a special moment as we were on sovereign U.S. soil taking an oath on her behalf and signing the last necessary pieces of paperwork. Now we simply wait to receive her passport back tomorrow with the visa enclosed - her official permission to enter the U.S., and once she goes through immigration at LAX she will officially be a U.S. citizen.<br />
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This is more than likely my final post from China. Tomorrow evening we'll catch a flight that leaves Guangzhou at 9:30pm and arrives in L.A. at 7:30pm the same day. (That's a minus 2 hour flight for those of you keeping track) With a 3 1/2 hour layover in L.A., we're hoping/praying we make our final flight in to Sac and will be sleeping in our own beds Wednesday night. There's so much more to digest and unpack from this journey and we'll be doing much more of that in the days to come, but suffice it to say for now that I am all the more convinced that adoption is a window into the heart of God.Cliff Careyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01760846253223848519noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8499680519654992581.post-25225840504750368262019-07-09T00:49:00.000-07:002019-07-09T06:24:34.279-07:00Days 5 & 6 - July 8-9 - Making Emilia OursIt is impossible to capture in words what we experienced yesterday and today. I wrote in my journal last night for over 6 pages, and still was maybe half way through everything just from yesterday. What a journey of sight, sound and emotion. Many things turned out differently than expected, and yet everything turned out right!<br />
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<b><span style="font-size: large;">Monday, July 8 - Gotcha Day</span></b></div>
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9:23AM - We took a quick picture in our hotel room on the way out and I posted it on Instagram, hoping that our friends back in the U.S. would see it and remember to pray for us. We were heading out to get her!</div>
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The drive took about a half hour through the rain and took us into an older part of Nanchang, much less modern and, as April would later describe it, a lot more like we expected China to be. We walked up a wet walkway and entered a nondescript building, heading for the 25th floor. The door opened up and there we were at the Jiangxi Provincial Registration Center of Foreign Adoption and Foreign Marriage. This is where we would be meeting our new daughter in just a few minutes. We rounded a few corners and were in the room. Also waiting there was another couple we had met the day before at our hotel. They were from Nashville and were adopting their second child from China (both with albinism.) </div>
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<a href="https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-RQXLRkSWhvQ/XSQxSitpEkI/AAAAAAAAZ5s/zh8ieqHpyhADJsGkd684FkCZYhfnaXQpACEwYBhgL/s1600/IMG_3216.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="900" data-original-width="1600" height="111" src="https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-RQXLRkSWhvQ/XSQxSitpEkI/AAAAAAAAZ5s/zh8ieqHpyhADJsGkd684FkCZYhfnaXQpACEwYBhgL/s200/IMG_3216.JPG" width="200" /></a>9:56AM - Through the entrance walk several people and it's instantly obvious that they are the ones bringing the children. The other family walks up and takes their new little 17 month old girl into their arms - and then we see a man holding Yun Xi. That's our girl! What do we do? Do we just go take her out of his arms? Do we wait? We'd imagined this moment for a long time, and of course it's playing out differently, but that's okay. She definitely has a bond with this man. He has traveled with her all the way from Beijing to bring her to us and she does not want to leave him. She was not happy! They very soon place her into April's arms and then she really starts to scream. I'm thinking to myself... this girl has some strong lungs and she does NOT want to be here. After a few minutes, April hands her to me, and immediately she takes the screaming to a whole new level. For both of us, we're experiencing a mix of emotions. We're so sad for her as she's obviously is confused, upset, and more than likely grieving yet another major loss in her life. We both recalled later that it was almost as though she knew what was happening. And yet we're also grateful that she's screaming and reaching out for this man that she knows. It means that she has experienced connection, and even though she's upset at leaving him, it gives us much confidence that she will learn how to connect with us. This is not always the story with adopted children, and it's something we've been spending a lot of time praying over for the last few years, long before we even knew who she was.</div>
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10:20AM - We're in the car and on our way. The driver starts leaving and something amazing happens... she just leans into April and is comforted. No smiles. No interaction. No looking around. But for this time in the car, she's settled... and she's settled with April. I start to just lean in and tell her stories about Titus and Audrey and how much she's going to love them, and how she's going to need that strength she obviously has to protect herself from them pushing her around. For the next while, she won't leave April's arms. We try to have me hold her a few different times, but she'll have none of that, and I'm okay with that. She's bonding with April and that's a good thing! As we get to the hotel, she's got her thumb in her mouth and continues to lean into April. She needs her mama! We finally get back to the room and begin getting settled in with her. </div>
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11:08AM - We finally set her down on the floor nestled in close to April, and give her some toys. Let's see if she'll play. For the next several minutes she plays, leans into April, plays a little more, leans in more; and she's even playing with Peter a little bit. <a href="https://www.instagram.com/p/BzpPReyhQlcjpDTEAijThwZuFBbxp3RlWM3hVE0/" target="_blank">Check out the video I posted on Instagram.</a> I've been doing my best to play with her, do a little peek-a-boo, and talk to her a lot. Pretty soon I stand up to get something and she's tracking with me. Progress! April needs to take a break, so it's my turn to try to hold her, and amazingly enough, she lets me. She even lets me giver her a bottle. I can't even begin to tell you all how important this is that she's attaching to both of us. From this point on, she has allowed either of us to hold her and comfort her. When either of us approaches her, she'll reach out. And boy does this girl love to cuddle. We heard that early on about her, and it's definitely true. She will just rest her head on our shoulders, put that thumb in her mouth, and finds her rest.</div>
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Afternoon - She took a nap next to April. We went on a family walk through the hotel, and then started feeding her. She has been a total champ. Our guide Mary had to go out and buy us a rice cooker so we could make a special protein-free rice for her here in the hotel room. She's eating the rice, enjoys puffs, banana, and pretty much anything we give her. It's time for us to get some room service and feed ourselves. Tired and yet encouraged, our first day with her is going better than we could have imagined. She had even allowed April to give her a sink bath. (Our adoption workers had warned us against trying a bath for the first few days because they said it was often quite traumatic for the child.) </div>
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7:26PM - The schedule they gave us for her says she normally goes to bed at 7. We're basically preparing ourselves for the worst. We'll probably be awake most of the night. She'll probably scream a lot. She'll probably be sleeping next to April all night, leaving April exhausted. None of that! Around 7:15, she starts to fall asleep on April. A little while later, April sets her down in her crib. She turns over, sticks that thumb in her mouth, and stayed asleep... and she didn't wake up till 6:30 this morning. WE ALL GOT A FULL NIGHT OF SLEEP!</div>
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<b><span style="font-size: large;">Tuesday, July 9 - Official Adoption Day</span></b></div>
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As I mentioned earlier, with China adoption, you don't sign the official adoption papers until you've had 24 hours to spend time with your child. We woke up slightly anxious, but definitely excited for what was to come today. Time to head back to the same location where we picked her up yesterday, but this time to make this official. We had been warned that this day would be hard and chaotic, that we'd be in a room with many other families adopting, and that there would be kids screaming everywhere, and that basically we needed to grin it and bear it. It was nothing like that at all...</div>
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<a href="https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-FHpFoYDIP-c/XSRAaIu20oI/AAAAAAAAZ6k/5c--M1HqRCIC_FP2L4DjmPFsekqF-NwfACEwYBhgL/s1600/IMG_0598.HEIC" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1200" data-original-width="1600" height="240" src="https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-FHpFoYDIP-c/XSRAaIu20oI/AAAAAAAAZ6k/5c--M1HqRCIC_FP2L4DjmPFsekqF-NwfACEwYBhgL/s320/IMG_0598.HEIC" width="320" /></a>9:50AM - We're in the same room where we picked her up yesterday, and there are only two other families there, both of whom we've already gotten to know back at the hotel. We have some great conversations with each of them about how the first night had gone. The adoption officials we interact with are friendly and obviously grateful. We sign lots of papers, take official pictures for the paperwork, sign some more papers, and then at 10:19 our guide Mary walks up to us with the official adoption certificate. She is now ours! </div>
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As we wind down Day 6 in China, we are so grateful for our new <i>Emilia Mae Yunxi Carey</i>. She is beautiful, quiet, loves to play with her stacking cups, knows what she likes and doesn't like, eats well, sleeps well, and cuddles with her mom and dad. The trip is far from over, but for now we're settled in and enjoying our new life as a family, longing all the more to be home and begin the new normal.</div>
Cliff Careyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01760846253223848519noreply@blogger.com5tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8499680519654992581.post-71785468448161984382019-07-06T05:15:00.001-07:002019-07-06T05:48:40.918-07:00Day 3 - Saturday, July 6 - Beijing<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">This is our guide Helen.</td></tr>
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Notice the flowering Lotus plants <br />
growing in the water</td></tr>
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Rickshaw Ride</td></tr>
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Reminded me of the 80's one hit wonder band Rockwell...<br />
"I always feel like somebody's watching me."<br />
(These are everywhere here.)</td></tr>
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Acrobat Show - The guy on the left actually<br />
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Acrobat Show - He went even higher after this.</td></tr>
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<br />Cliff Careyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01760846253223848519noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8499680519654992581.post-75641080885921673472019-07-05T05:33:00.000-07:002019-07-05T05:33:37.550-07:00Day 2 - Friday, July 5 - The Great WallWe've been grateful to have Bethany Christian Services as our adoption agency. They know what they're doing, having helped families like ours bring home thousands of orphans from China over the years. A key part of the trip is the first few days. They intentionally have you arrive in the country four to five days before you receive your child. This helps parents gain a good understanding of the child's culture, while also giving a few days to get over the jet lag.<br />
<a href="https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-fGfSuFfX4kk/XR9AXFsKb_I/AAAAAAAAZ20/1GWf4XK7CVo0SwPML_xfJ8pTJ5Q-lnczACLcBGAs/s1600/IMG_6935.HEIC" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1600" data-original-width="1200" height="200" src="https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-fGfSuFfX4kk/XR9AXFsKb_I/AAAAAAAAZ20/1GWf4XK7CVo0SwPML_xfJ8pTJ5Q-lnczACLcBGAs/s200/IMG_6935.HEIC" width="150" /></a><br />
<a href="https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-ysPz4WAOifk/XR8_1ZBbdcI/AAAAAAAAZ2o/ts-eTRRb8ScxIM2PJqfQEwD5O4WJPUSVACLcBGAs/s1600/IMG_5866.HEIC" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1600" data-original-width="1200" height="200" src="https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-ysPz4WAOifk/XR8_1ZBbdcI/AAAAAAAAZ2o/ts-eTRRb8ScxIM2PJqfQEwD5O4WJPUSVACLcBGAs/s200/IMG_5866.HEIC" width="150" /></a>April and I were talking earlier today about how glad we are that we're taking these first few days at the beginning of the trip like Bethany recommended. We tried to imagine receiving our little girl the morning after having been traveling for 27 straight hours. Suffice it to say, it would have been awful. We would have been a mess. She would have been a mess. It would have been a mess all the way around!<br />
<a href="https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-kXi1hUFlicU/XR9AsLROprI/AAAAAAAAZ3A/BxwDSsXe5b0nj1LzxNzntYAxol0o2E0OwCLcBGAs/s1600/IMG_8272.HEIC" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1200" data-original-width="1600" height="150" src="https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-kXi1hUFlicU/XR9AsLROprI/AAAAAAAAZ3A/BxwDSsXe5b0nj1LzxNzntYAxol0o2E0OwCLcBGAs/s200/IMG_8272.HEIC" width="200" /></a><a href="https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-PzAoVBd9peY/XR8_SXEq78I/AAAAAAAAZ2g/tg36g7tHctgeHMc_le_MKljt8yZHle_jQCLcBGAs/s1600/IMG_1925.HEIC" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1203" data-original-width="1600" height="150" src="https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-PzAoVBd9peY/XR8_SXEq78I/AAAAAAAAZ2g/tg36g7tHctgeHMc_le_MKljt8yZHle_jQCLcBGAs/s200/IMG_1925.HEIC" width="200" /></a><br />
Our guide took us to the Great Wall today - a once in a lifetime experience. We climbed SO MANY STAIRS. My phone told me it was equivalent to 74 flights! We climbed... climbed a little more, rested for a minute, climbed more... and well, you get it. The views were breathtaking and it was so significant to stand on such an historic spot. It was a moment none of us would forget. And to cap it off, we were able to FaceTime back to Fresno and talk to Titus, Audrey, Grandma and Grandpa.<br />
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All in all, it was the perfect way to spend our first full day in China. Tomorrow will be Tiananmen Square, the Forbidden City, Hutong Tour and an Acrobatic show. More to come...<br />
<a href="https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-eAabv-0Ssec/XR9APErn4KI/AAAAAAAAZ2w/-Qs71fDkW7Im1RUVR8QEZc9kKKtItD2QwCLcBGAs/s1600/IMG_7984.HEIC" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; display: inline !important; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em; text-align: center;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1203" data-original-width="1600" height="150" src="https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-eAabv-0Ssec/XR9APErn4KI/AAAAAAAAZ2w/-Qs71fDkW7Im1RUVR8QEZc9kKKtItD2QwCLcBGAs/s200/IMG_7984.HEIC" width="200" /></a>Cliff Careyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01760846253223848519noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8499680519654992581.post-29999136076343004322019-07-05T03:08:00.000-07:002019-07-05T03:08:12.179-07:00Day 1 - Sacramento to Beijing (via Shanghai)<table cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="float: left; margin-right: 1em; text-align: left;"><tbody>
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Thank you Greg Thwing for the ride. </td></tr>
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Wednesday, July 3... the beginning of the final journey to get Emilia. </div>
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<a href="https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-PvEFOJsZWWA/XR8hAqwyrDI/AAAAAAAAZ2Q/yh3vzkNPmbAbZ_ILS6bAP-nhmvFCov6WQCLcBGAs/s1600/E0463418-C61D-4A10-8D46-B634B6544DAC.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1333" data-original-width="750" height="320" src="https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-PvEFOJsZWWA/XR8hAqwyrDI/AAAAAAAAZ2Q/yh3vzkNPmbAbZ_ILS6bAP-nhmvFCov6WQCLcBGAs/s320/E0463418-C61D-4A10-8D46-B634B6544DAC.JPG" width="180" /></a>Upon arriving at the Sacramento airport we learned that our flight would be delayed up to a half hour. We figured we could handle that since we would still have an hour to make our connection in San Francisco. Well... that was not to be. The Sacramento flight ended up being delayed so long that we missed our flight to Beijing, but United came through and rerouted us through Shanghai. </div>
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Waiting in Shanghai</td></tr>
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Shanghai was another adventure as we had a pretty tight connection transferring from an international flight to domestic. This time it was Air China that came through in the bind, and allowed us to check in for a flight that they had already closed. We were able to get through security quickly, gate check our bag, and then... wait... because of course this flight was delayed. The delay gave us some time to regroup and then we were off to Beijing. </div>
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<table cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; text-align: right;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-d6rHTt6LIRo/XR8fotvzqDI/AAAAAAAAZ18/RSLNY2hBOhg6zfaCBcnLGMTp5e3OhJnogCLcBGAs/s1600/IMG_2305.HEIC" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1203" data-original-width="1600" height="150" src="https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-d6rHTt6LIRo/XR8fotvzqDI/AAAAAAAAZ18/RSLNY2hBOhg6zfaCBcnLGMTp5e3OhJnogCLcBGAs/s200/IMG_2305.HEIC" width="200" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">We've finally made it to Beijing.</td></tr>
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Our guide Helen met us at the airport, and off we went to our hotel to finally get to bed sometime around 12:30am local time. All said, it was about a 27 hour travel day. Exhausted and excited, off to bed we went.</div>
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Cliff Careyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01760846253223848519noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8499680519654992581.post-82080165791954481252019-06-28T08:29:00.000-07:002019-06-28T16:39:14.655-07:00It's finally time to head out!<table cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="float: left; text-align: justify;"><tbody>
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<a href="https://cdn.airplane-pictures.net/images/uploaded-images/2013/10/23/329609.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" data-original-height="546" data-original-width="800" height="217" src="https://cdn.airplane-pictures.net/images/uploaded-images/2013/10/23/329609.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
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United Airlines 777-200 Departing San Francisco</div>
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<b>It's finally time to head out!</b> I can't even begin to tell you how excited we are to have this moment finally upon us. Every day, multiple times a day for the last month, we've been checking the message portal from Bethany Christian Services, our adoption agency to see if there is any new travel info for us that will give an idea of when we're going. Three months ago, Bethany told us that travel typically happens about three months from when you receive the "Letter of Acceptance." Well, they nailed that prediction to within one day.</div>
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Wednesday morning (July 3) we'll catch a puddle jumper to San Francisco and then spend the next 12 hours on a United 777 on our way to Beijing. (Aviation geeks <a href="https://flightaware.com/live/flight/map/UAL888/history/20190627/1805Z/KSFO/ZBAA" target="_blank">click here</a> to see the flight track of yesterday's flight.)</div>
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://ak.jogurucdn.com/media/image/p17/place-2015-07-22-5-Nanchang3eb5e070962d935f7a65c8074d871f0c.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" data-original-height="305" data-original-width="478" height="203" src="https://ak.jogurucdn.com/media/image/p17/place-2015-07-22-5-Nanchang3eb5e070962d935f7a65c8074d871f0c.jpg" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Nanchang - Jiangxi Province</td></tr>
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Sunday the 7th, we head to Nanchang where we'll finally get to meet Emilia (that's what we're naming her) for the first time and spend the week settling in and getting to know each other. Leading up to this, we've assumed Nanchang to be kind of a small town for China - you know, maybe the size of Fresno. Well... I guess we really need to rethink our understanding of "small" in China, because Nanchang is a small city of 5 million!</div>
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://www.brucedamonte.com/wp-content/uploads/2015/02/GuangzhouConsulateGeneral_Photo%C2%A9BruceDamonte_01.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" data-original-height="600" data-original-width="800" height="240" src="https://www.brucedamonte.com/wp-content/uploads/2015/02/GuangzhouConsulateGeneral_Photo%C2%A9BruceDamonte_01.jpg" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">US Consulate - Guangzhou</td></tr>
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Saturday the 13th, we're off to Guangzhou where we'll spend the remainder of our time securing her Visa to enter the U.S. And then we'll finally catch a non-stop flight on China Southern back to L.A. (Airbus A380 double decker - And our seats our in the center section - very last row.)</div>
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://live.staticflickr.com/5554/14069420228_f8e59f9987_b.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" data-original-height="534" data-original-width="800" height="212" src="https://live.staticflickr.com/5554/14069420228_f8e59f9987_b.jpg" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">China Southern A380 Landing at LAX</td></tr>
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We cap that day off with a quick hour and a half flight on Southwest back to Sacramento and then it's time to truly begin living in this next chapter of Carey Family Life.</div>
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Cliff Careyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01760846253223848519noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8499680519654992581.post-68806849471595688002019-06-25T10:24:00.002-07:002019-06-25T10:24:46.603-07:00We think we have a departure dateWe just got word yesterday that there's a pretty good chance we'll be heading to China next Wednesday the 3rd. We're waiting on the US Consulate in Guangzhou to grant our Visa appointment, and then we'll know for sure. I'll keep you updated!Cliff Careyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01760846253223848519noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8499680519654992581.post-90112552630023207062019-06-07T17:04:00.001-07:002019-06-07T17:04:45.697-07:00Mother's Day Collage<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-u5Ev1hZgRXQ/XPr7i3TflbI/AAAAAAAAZW0/jbWa6lyREjM0nlbUrw1JhApgqDQDjGCagCLcBGAs/s1600/33420ef58ff00fe14c3b9323cc6281d5_collage.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1200" data-original-width="1600" height="240" src="https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-u5Ev1hZgRXQ/XPr7i3TflbI/AAAAAAAAZW0/jbWa6lyREjM0nlbUrw1JhApgqDQDjGCagCLcBGAs/s320/33420ef58ff00fe14c3b9323cc6281d5_collage.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
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<span id="goog_1905985162"></span><span id="goog_1905985163"></span>Cliff Careyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01760846253223848519noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8499680519654992581.post-62614575181711500462019-06-06T15:38:00.002-07:002019-06-07T16:32:33.822-07:00China is getting closerJust in the last few days we received confirmation from our adoption agency that the US Consulate in Guangzhou has received our DS-260 documents. What does that mean you might ask? Well... it basically means that our window of travel will be anywhere from 1-4 weeks from June 18 (when our Article V approval is scheduled to be issued.)<br />
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Given that most families depart the U.S. on a Wednesday, we can pretty much narrow our departure to one of four dates: <b> June 26, July 3, July 10 or July 17.</b> This basically depends on how many families they are able to get together to travel at the same time.<br />
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Here's a little breakdown of what the trip will be like:<br />
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<a href="https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-a7o7UiHlSVY/XPmWqkkDUZI/AAAAAAAAZWQ/4QAchEX5pXE8CCLD6E8fh16GFqHbRZknwCLcBGAs/s1600/Screen%2BShot%2B2019-06-06%2Bat%2B3.41.06%2BPM.png" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="798" data-original-width="1600" height="158" src="https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-a7o7UiHlSVY/XPmWqkkDUZI/AAAAAAAAZWQ/4QAchEX5pXE8CCLD6E8fh16GFqHbRZknwCLcBGAs/s320/Screen%2BShot%2B2019-06-06%2Bat%2B3.41.06%2BPM.png" width="320" /></a>It will take roughly 14 days. We arrive in Beijing (<span style="color: red;">RED</span> pin on map) on a Thursday and spend a few days getting acclimated to the time and culture, while also getting to be tourists. (Peter's going to love this!) This part is key in helping families get settled and rested before they start in on the very unsettling process of removing a child from the only home they know.<br />
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<a href="https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-DoDicvtHnws/XPmZeUc8COI/AAAAAAAAZWc/mllX96YpBgYVHv7wzd74ss2Na1m40IZiACLcBGAs/s1600/Screen%2BShot%2B2019-06-06%2Bat%2B3.52.54%2BPM.png" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1166" data-original-width="725" height="320" src="https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-DoDicvtHnws/XPmZeUc8COI/AAAAAAAAZWc/mllX96YpBgYVHv7wzd74ss2Na1m40IZiACLcBGAs/s320/Screen%2BShot%2B2019-06-06%2Bat%2B3.52.54%2BPM.png" width="198" /></a>After about thee days in Beijing, we travel to Nanchang, (<span style="color: blue;">BLUE</span> pin on map) the city where Emilia lives in the orphanage. We'll take custody of her almost immediately and begin our new lives together. We're told that the next several days are incredibly hard. They'll be spent finalizing the adoption on the China side, getting her passport and just taking care of her, while doing everything possible to establish positive bonding.<br />
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From Nanchang, we'll travel to Guangzhou, (<span style="color: #93c47d;">GREEN</span> pin on map) the home of the U.S. Consulate. We'll be there for a few days, doing some touristy things, and then the final major step... obtaining her Visa to enter the U.S.<br />
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The trip home comes next and here's the cool thing: Based upon the fact that the U.S. and China have adopted the policies of the Hague Convention, the moment she passes Immigration coming into the U.S., she becomes a U.S. citizen.<br />
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So there you have it. Thanks for joining us in praying for our sweet Emilia and her transition into the Carey family. More to come!Cliff Careyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01760846253223848519noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8499680519654992581.post-53745071067052592442019-06-01T16:16:00.001-07:002019-06-01T16:19:46.825-07:00A few picturesIn case you've been wondering what she looks like, here's Emilia. (This is the name we are giving her.) The name she was given is Yun Xi. She was born in March, 2018 and will be 15-16 months old when we pick her up.<br />
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<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-qltXIsZYMK0/XPMG7ryTsOI/AAAAAAAAZMQ/OpNzS0pOdEQggnAfjwPVBmlFYxQtMH1iwCLcBGAs/s1600/Hong%2BYunxi-%2BMarch%2B2019.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1440" data-original-width="1080" height="320" src="https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-qltXIsZYMK0/XPMG7ryTsOI/AAAAAAAAZMQ/OpNzS0pOdEQggnAfjwPVBmlFYxQtMH1iwCLcBGAs/s320/Hong%2BYunxi-%2BMarch%2B2019.jpg" width="240" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">1st Birthday</td></tr>
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-cLhmrwFNDNQ/XPMG7tz_qCI/AAAAAAAAZMM/GZjBRXxLya8KcOC9J6soHp60W8zFNChEwCLcBGAs/s1600/pic%2B2.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1339" data-original-width="1600" height="267" src="https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-cLhmrwFNDNQ/XPMG7tz_qCI/AAAAAAAAZMM/GZjBRXxLya8KcOC9J6soHp60W8zFNChEwCLcBGAs/s320/pic%2B2.jpg" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">This is the first picture we got to see of her.</td></tr>
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<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-U_UvCNja278/XPMG74pFsjI/AAAAAAAAZMU/UjrndezJOzgMl0h_Pogk_gLbUz7wkNH7QCLcBGAs/s1600/pic%2B3.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1600" data-original-width="1210" height="320" src="https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-U_UvCNja278/XPMG74pFsjI/AAAAAAAAZMU/UjrndezJOzgMl0h_Pogk_gLbUz7wkNH7QCLcBGAs/s320/pic%2B3.jpg" width="241" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">She has no trouble smiling.</td></tr>
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<br />Cliff Careyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01760846253223848519noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8499680519654992581.post-76470283856272248342019-05-31T06:40:00.000-07:002019-05-31T06:40:08.992-07:00We're heading to China soonKeep your eyes on this blog as this is where we will be posting updates from our trip to bring our little girl home from China. Our best guess is that we'll be heading over there in 4-5 weeks.Cliff Careyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01760846253223848519noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8499680519654992581.post-8064937069556538992014-01-31T13:54:00.001-08:002014-01-31T14:42:13.111-08:00Who did that personality test say I'm supposed to be?Lately I've been compiling all the personality and leadership profiles I've ever taken, as well as taking a few more, just to be sure I know exactly who I am.<br />
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<b>THE RESULTS</b></h4>
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<ul>
<li><a href="http://strengths.gallup.com/default.aspx" target="_blank">Strengthsfinder 2.0</a> (2014): Restorative - Responsibility - Harmony - Belief - Connectedness</li>
<li><a href="https://youruniquedesign.com/default.aspx" target="_blank">Your Unique Design</a> (2013): Harmonizer - Persister - Achiever - Dreamer - Energizer - Catalyzer</li>
<li><a href="http://standout.tmbc.com/" target="_blank">StandOut</a> (2012): Advisor - Connector</li>
<li>Strengthsfinder (2005): Responsibility - Activator - Belief - Harmony - Relator</li>
<li><a href="http://www.myersbriggs.org/" target="_blank">Myers-Briggs</a> (2001): ESTJ (Extrovert - Sensing - Thinking - Judging)</li>
<li><a href="https://timlahaye.com/Home/Product/147" target="_blank">Tim LaHaye Temperament Analysis</a> (2001): Choleric - Melancholy</li>
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WHAT DOES THIS ALL MEAN?</h4>
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Apparently I enjoy leading people, being a resource, and networking. I tend to be responsible and can get things done. I'm not a huge fan of using my imagination or dreaming up new things, but tend to thrive when I'm in more of an implementation role than a creative one. I like harmony and can be a people-pleaser, which can get me in trouble sometimes if I'm not careful. But in general I tend to use my past experiences and my network of connections to hopefully further the kingdom. And I'm having a blast doing it!</div>
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THE GOOD</h4>
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These tests are very useful in that they help us understand who we are, how God created (or wired) us, and shed light on how we relate to others. They help us know how to deal with different people, and help other people know how to deal with us. They can even tell us careers where we will thrive and ones we should avoid.</div>
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I took the <a href="http://standout.tmbc.com/" target="_blank">StandOut</a> assessment about two years ago after hearing Marcus Buckingham speak at <a href="https://catalystconference.com/" target="_blank">Catalyst</a>. It's become my favorite assessment because it somehow is able to tell who other people see you to be as a leader. I answered all the questions and then waited an eternity (30 seconds) to receive my results. They nailed it! As I read the analysis, I identified with just about everything it said. Since taking it, I've been able to refer back many times, and have found it quite helpful in keeping me focused on where I lead best.</div>
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THE PROBLEM</h4>
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<i><b>There is no assessment or analysis that can completely evaluate the whole person.</b></i> They will all fall short in one way or another. God knit us together so uniquely and in His image. (Psalm 139) Because we are fallen people, there's no way we can use human systems to completely define how God made us. I recently had a fun conversations with two friends, Sarah and Jen. Sarah is exactly like me according to the Myers-Briggs. Jen is exactly like me according to Your Unique Design. The problem: Sarah and Jen are nothing alike at all! The logic of "If A=B and B=C then A=C" doesn't work here. It just goes to show that no one test is able to define the entire person. God does that. He defines who we are.</div>
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<b><i>Sometimes these assessments don't leave room for the Holy Spirit to do a redeeming work in our lives.</i> </b>Results of a test are static and represent who we are at a moment in time, but our lives are dynamic and in a constant state of change. As a child of God and one that's filled with the Holy Spirit, I should be constantly growing and changing into someone more conformed to His image. As I change and grow, the assessment that I took five years ago may no longer reflect who I am today.</div>
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<b><i>We can become pigeonholed by an assessment.</i> </b>We may think we are unable to perform certain tasks because an assessment told us we couldn't do them well. People in leadership over us may not give us certain opportunities because the assessment told them that we weren't any good in that area. We end up missing out on potential growth simply because the assessment said we couldn't do it well. </div>
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The other day I was in an office where each employee had their assessment displayed on their office door. It makes a great conversation starter and I like being able to get a quick picture of who each person is, but it also can predispose me to a certain judgment of that person and who that assessment tells me they're going to be.</div>
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<h4>
WHAT DOES SCRIPTURE TEACH?</h4>
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Scripture clearly teaches that God has given us certain gifts (1 Corinthians 12:8-10) and that we are to exercise those gifts for the common good (v7). We also learn about the Fruits of the Spirit (Galatians 5), character traits and actions that can pretty much only be performed through the power of God's Spirit working in and through us.</div>
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And yet there's this one thing that I can't help but keep coming back to: "God's power is made perfect in weakness." (2 Corinthians 12) When Paul was given the thorn in the flesh, he told us that it was "to keep me from becoming conceited..."(v7) No matter how much he begged God to take this weakness away, God allowed it to stay in order that God might get the glory, not Paul. </div>
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I believe that strengths assessments in particular can lend themselves to giving us the glory through things that we're good at, as opposed to God receiving the glory through things that don't make sense in our wisdom. Granted, God gave us those particular strengths; and yet, through the flesh, it can become easy for each of us to take credit, as opposed to offering thanks for the good work He does through us. Contrast that with times where God uses us through our weaknesses. It is in those moments where God can't help but get the glory, because it's something that was obviously impossible for us to accomplish through our own flesh.</div>
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<h4>
PERSONAL APPLICATION</h4>
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My life tends to be a testimony of God working through weakness; and there have been plenty of opportunities for that. The greatest of these has been the loss of our daughter almost four years ago. Through the darkest and hardest days, God's grace and mercy clearly shined through to our family, and hopefully to all those around us. I've been reminded by many of how much God used Elyse's life and death to draw them closer to Him. This is something that never could have happened through a strength or leadership gift. This was 100% a work of the Holy Spirit.</div>
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And then there are the times I've fallen short through my flesh. Even through my sin and past mistakes, however, God shows Himself faithful because of His deep grace, redemption and conquering of the sin and struggles. By sharing those struggles with others, I see Him give encouragement and draw them closer to Him. He is faithful to use everything for is glory! </div>
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I would challenge anyone reading these words to consider today all the tests you've taken, all the ways God's wired you, the strengths and weaknesses that supposedly define you, and lay those at the cross. Take the tests, learn from them, follow their advice... but don't let them define you! You are defined by Christ. You are made in God's image. Allow Him to mould you, to change you, to use you. Allow Him, not only through your strengths, but especially through your weaknesses, to use you. It's in those moments where you will see God doing "abundantly more than we could ever ask or think." (Ephesians 3:20) And the result will be... </div>
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<b><i>"... to Him be glory in the church and in Christ Jesus through all generations, </i></b></div>
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<b><i>forever and ever. Amen." </i></b></div>
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<b><i><span style="font-size: x-small;">Ephesians 3:21</span></i></b></div>
Cliff Careyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01760846253223848519noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8499680519654992581.post-60207449386704764402012-07-28T11:06:00.000-07:002012-07-28T11:06:12.157-07:0010 1/2 MonthsDuring this coming week, Titus will be the same age that Elyse was when she passed away... 10 1/2 months. This is a number that has been impressed on our hearts for the last 2 1/2 years. Anytime we talk of her passing, we can't help but mention this number.<br />
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So now this number also belongs to Titus. Every parent I've ever talked to that has lost a child and then has more to follow really can't wait to get past this monument. It's easy to be filled with the unnecessary and unreasonable fear of potentially losing this child too. And at times it can be almost paralyzing. </div>
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We are now watching as Titus is going through all the same stages where Elyse was at that age, and it's almost exactly on the same timeline she was on.</div>
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-hUu1z1XA0d0/S42u7NlKPaI/AAAAAAAAB2w/YEQy834BVOM/s1600/2010+01+20_2156_edited-1.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="212" src="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-hUu1z1XA0d0/S42u7NlKPaI/AAAAAAAAB2w/YEQy834BVOM/s320/2010+01+20_2156_edited-1.jpg" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Elyse playing under the dining room table</td></tr>
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Titus loves to play around those exact same chairs.<br />
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(Notice Peter reading a story in the background. That boy<br />
will be in Kindergarten in less than a month! I can't believe<br />
how quickly he is growing up.)</td></tr>
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Titus has just recently started trying to pull himself up. </td></tr>
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-534oQIU-a7c/S42u_ODFLfI/AAAAAAAAB3A/4o7SunuI2Bk/s1600/2010+02+08_2212.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="320" src="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-534oQIU-a7c/S42u_ODFLfI/AAAAAAAAB3A/4o7SunuI2Bk/s320/2010+02+08_2212.jpg" width="213" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">This one was taken just a few days before she passed. <br />
She was so proud of herself after pulling herself <br />
up to a standing position on that stairway.</td></tr>
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It's almost surreal to be in this spot. A very positive part of it all is that it brings back the most recent memories we have of Elyse, memories that are now almost 2 1/2 years old. When I watch Ty do a certain thing, it totally takes me back to Elyse doing that exact same thing, and that is a very GOOD thing. I pray that those memories will never disappear. </div>
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Yes... it's hard when I think about not being able to have her right there with us... but it's also a very precious thing to carry on those memories.</div>
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The bottom line is this: we miss Elyse each and every day, some days more than others; and this stage in Ty's life brings back especially poignant memories. </div>
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Not too long ago, April changed some of the decorations on our living room mantle. As I look at them today, they really do characterize our life as a family. We remember Elyse every day, but we are also reminded every day by her of the HOPE that we have in eternity. Titus is an incredible blessing and has brought us much comfort. <b><i>2 Corinthians 7:6 - "But God, who comforts the downcast, comforted us by the coming of Titus, ..."</i></b> And notice the globe in the upper left, with Africa front and center. We look forward (with hope) to the day we get to meet the little girl God has picked out for us over there. (<a href="http://www.facebook.com/careyadoption">www.facebook.com/careyadoption</a>) </div>
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The bottom line: We live today with much <b>hope</b>. We miss our little girl like nothing else, but we truly are blessed. God has provided us three incredible children so far, and with the upcoming adoption... even more. He has given us a great family, the most incredible friends, and continues to provide for every physical need we have.<br />
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Would I change anything??? Absolutely! I'd take my little girl back in a heartbeat! But I wouldn't change who I've become as a result of all of this. He has taken me to the deepest and darkest places and has proved Himself to be completely <b><i>good, faithful and sovereign</i></b> through it all. He truly is a loving and grace-filled God.</div>
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</div>Cliff Careyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01760846253223848519noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8499680519654992581.post-5906133219489066632012-04-14T22:54:00.000-07:002012-04-14T22:54:00.655-07:00All good things must come to an endI write this post with both a heavy heart and a lot of excitement. After an amazing 15 year run at Hume Lake Christian Camps, April and I have decided that it's time for a major change, and I will be bringing my full-time service at Hume to a close at the end of this month.<br />
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<b>What am I going to do?</b> As of the first of May, I will be assuming a position as Business Manager for Briner and Son, a landscape design and maintenance business here in Fresno owned by April's family. (Yes, I am breaking a major rule I set up years ago and I am going to work for relatives. Not to mention... the in-laws!) For once in my life, I'll actually be putting that Business Major to use. My responsibilities will include H.R., A/P, A/R, I.T., a whole bunch of special projects, and pretty much anything else that needs to be done. It's a growing business and I get to fill a necessary role that will hopefully help them grow even more and become more efficient.<br />
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<b>Leaving Hume</b> was a tough decision, one we started putting before the Lord over a year ago. I've always joked that I wanted to leave Hume two years before I got fired, but in all seriousness I believe that I'm leaving with the satisfaction of knowing that God brought me there, grew and matured me, used me in ways I never could have imagined, and now has given me the freedom to head out and be used in an entirely different way.<br />
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<b>What will I miss most about Hume?</b> No question, more than anything, it will be the people. It's been called the "H Factor." It's the Hume staff and their families that make up Hume's personality and the core of what makes it so unique. I will miss them more than anything. They have been there for me through the hardest of times and through the best of times. They introduced me to my wife, welcomed my children into the world, and carried me to Jesus as I had to say goodbye to my daughter. They've loved me unconditionally when I really didn't deserve it, and God's used them to mold me into someone a lot better than I was on May 26, 1997, when I pulled into a camp towing a trailer with everything that I owned and stepped into the role of Ponderosa Head Counselor, really having no clue. I'll also miss the many connections I've made with so many youth pastors, getting to encourage them, love on them, challenge them, listen to them. I'll miss being a part of something so much greater than myself.<br />
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<b>What do I look forward to?</b> I believe that God has brought me to this place in life "for such a time as this." I'm going to have so many more opportunities to be around people that don't know the Lord and who desperately need Him. I'm excited to be around non-Christians on a regular basis. I'm excited to have my faith challenged, to be a light. And to be perfectly honest, I'm excited for some change. It's easy to get stuck in ruts and be convinced that God can only use you in a certain way.<br />
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<b>Do I plan to stay in ministry?</b> Absolutely! That doesn't change. There are some great new opportunities on the horizon, and while I can't totally explain those in this forum, it's going to be fun to see how they pan out. When will they pan out and what will they look like??? No clue!<br />
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<b>What doesn't change?</b> <i><b>God is good. God is faithful. God is sovereign.</b></i> I love those three things most about God and I'm excited that I get to serve Him no matter where He has me. God has truly reminded me lately that it's not so much about <b><i>where </i></b>I am as it is about <b><i>who </i></b>I am. He's called me to follow Him wholeheartedly and to be faithful. From there, He will take care of the rest. I believed that 15 years ago when I came to Hume and I believe that today as I move on. My identity rests in Him, not in where I work or live.<br />
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So that's the big news. Be watching for more and please be praying for us. The last two years have been absolutely crazy, and while we would cherish a time of peaceful waters, we realize that's not the road God has us on, so we embrace this road and seek to stay faithful as we travel down it.Cliff Careyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01760846253223848519noreply@blogger.com10tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8499680519654992581.post-83652636340659118232012-03-23T22:56:00.002-07:002012-03-23T22:58:09.858-07:00Life in the CityWe've now lived in Clovis for almost 5 months. It's hard to believe so much time has passed, but it also feels completely normal, as though we've lived here for a year or two. It truly has become home.<br />
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Some things I've grown to enjoy as we've transitioned here:<br />
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<li><b><i>Stores </i></b>- We now have grocery stores, Costco, Starbucks, etc. all within a 10 minute drive. Big change from the 1 1/2 hours we experienced before. (Of course, now it's easier to spend money on things I don't really need.)</li>
<li><b><i>Family </i></b>- They're close... really close. April's family all live within a 4 mile radius of our house. It's given us a greater connection and allowed us to be in each others' lives on a pretty regular basis. Yes - that's a good thing!</li>
<li><b><i>Church</i></b> - We've really enjoyed attending the Clovis campus of <a href="http://www.thewellcommunity.org/" target="_blank">The Well Community Church</a>. We've started to meet new people, and have just enjoyed being a part of that community.</li>
<li><b><i>Neighbors </i></b>- We had neighbors at Hume, neighbors that we absolutely loved. But the big difference now is that the majority of our neighbors don't know the Lord and have a desperate need for Him. It's been so cool getting to know Bob & Dorothy, Mark, Jimmy & Cindy, Tim, and so many more. My prayer is that we can get beyond the hellos and goodbyes, and be able to have some significant conversations. </li>
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What do we miss? We miss our friends... deep friends... friends that you just can't find anywhere else. When others moved away from Hume, they warned us. They told us that we'd never have the same kind of friends as we had there and they were absolutely right. Our friends there walked with us through the darkest days ever and carried us to the Lord when we couldn't carry ourselves. We will forever treasure the friends the Lord gave us there and the depth of those friendships. We keep in touch, but it's just not the same.</div>
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Yet here we are, living in the city, and we know that God has called us to be here "for such a time as this." We remember and treasure the past, but live in the now, with a hope for the future, knowing that our citizenship lies in heaven, not in Clovis and not at Hume. So we make every effort to live here, right where God has called us. Yet our ultimate hope is in that one day we will live in eternity with our Lord (and we'll get to see our little girl again) and we'll be able to stop, look around, and know that we are finally home for good. </div>Cliff Careyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01760846253223848519noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8499680519654992581.post-18723259560335595052012-01-02T21:48:00.000-08:002012-01-02T21:48:02.831-08:00Target, Stuff, Gratitude and AdoptionAfter dinner tonight we stopped by Target to pick up a few things for Peter's first day of preschool tomorrow. As we wandered our way through the store, found what we needed and were on our way out, Peter started to complain that we hadn't bought anything for him. As we got into the car, we tried to convince him that he had enough stuff and that he didn't need any more. He wouldn't budge, and went on to say, "I want stuff. I like stuff." He just couldn't get enough "stuff."<div>
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April and I looked at each other and knew this could be a pivotal moment. We could just silence him and say that we weren't going to buy him anything and be frustrated, or we could try to turn it into a teachable moment. Fortunately we chose the latter, and what developed was an absolutely beautiful conversation.</div>
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For the next couple of minutes, we got to share with Peter that there were a lot of children out there in the world that didn't have enough food to eat, a warm bed to sleep in, or toys to play with. They didn't have "stuff" like he did.</div>
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Peter's response stopped us in our tracks. "Why don't they have beds to sleep in? They could sleep at our house. We have room." As tears formed in April's eyes, our frustration with his apparent greed turned into joy that he "got it." April went on to explain to him that this was why we're adopting "Baby Girl from Africa."</div>
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For most of the drive home we got to talk about when we would bring her home, how it would happen, what room she would sleep in, if she could sleep in Peter's bed, and much more. He really wanted to give up his bed for her to sleep in. </div>
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As parents we pray for these kinds of teachable moments, but how often do we take advantage of them? We are grateful that God has blessed us with the privilege of shepherding Peter's heart and pointing it toward Christ. More to come in future posts about the progress of the adoption, but for now we have grateful hearts for a simple teachable moment.</div>Cliff Careyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01760846253223848519noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8499680519654992581.post-88090184001719659252011-12-28T22:58:00.000-08:002011-12-30T16:04:41.372-08:00Christmas 2011<br />
It's been forever since I've posted, but I've determined that 2012 will be the year that I start blogging a bit more consistently. So here I go.<br />
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This Fall has been a whirlwind for our family. Back in July, the leadership at HLCC decided that they wanted me to base out of Fresno and take on a full-time role in Church Relations, with a major emphasis on Adult Ministries. This meant packing up the last 14 years of life at Hume and moving to Clovis. (Fortunately, two years earlier we bought a house and had been renting it to some great friends.) My boss let me know that he wanted us to move in mid-September. With the baby coming on September 14, I begged for a November 1 move. He was good with that and it was time to start packing. It's been a good transition and we're quickly adapting to life in the "outside" world.<br />
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Titus Levi Carey came into the world on September 14, and what a blessing he has been to our family. Our first three months with him haven't been without their challenges though. I think some people believed that bringing a new baby into the world would solve all of our pain from losing Elyse. The fact is that nothing or no one could ever replace our little girl. She will always be a part of this family.<br />
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We knew we'd have some sort of baggage with a new baby, but didn't know exactly what that would look like. For both of us, we realized early on we were holding back a lot of affection that Ty deserved. The problem was that we were afraid to completely bond with him for fear of losing him. Having experienced this kind of loss first-hand, it's just too easy to imagine the worse case scenario. Once we realized some of these issues we were able to really work on these things and have really been enjoying the last month with Titus.<br />
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Titus has such an engaging smile, and tries as hard as he can to talk to us. This boy communicates in ways that we never saw Peter or Elyse do at this age. His name means "giant" or "defender," and we pray often that he would take on those traits as he grows in a love and passion for serving the Lord.<br />
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There's much more to tell about our world, but I'll save it for later. We appreciate your prayers for our family as well as for our extended family right now. There are several challenges, but God is so good and faithful and we are grateful for His daily work in our lives. On a daily basis my prayer is to be obedient to His Word and sensitive to His Spirit.<br />
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I look forward to future posts and sharing some really cool stories of how God continues to show Himself faithful.Cliff Careyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01760846253223848519noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8499680519654992581.post-5602997322946524962011-09-11T14:39:00.000-07:002011-09-11T14:39:27.551-07:00We could use some prayer<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">So this coming Wednesday, September 14, is the scheduled arrival of our new little boy (name to be announced with statistics upon his arrival.) April is scheduled for a 7:30am C-Section, which means we'll probably be meeting this little guy around 8am. I will definitely post a lot of pictures on my Facebook page, so keep your eyes open.</span><br />
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">In the meantime, we could really use some prayer for some very specific things:</span><br />
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<li><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">April has come down with some sort of <b>stomach flu</b>, and being only 3 days out, this obviously presents some major complications, not to mention just the pain and discomfort she's feeling. I'm praying for complete healing from this.</span></li>
<li><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">I am coming down with a <b>chest cold</b>, and if it's anything like my last one (and it's acting like it is,) this could wipe me out. With April having a C-Section, I really need to be around for her in those first few days and this would really make that difficult. Again, praying for complete healing.</span></li>
<li><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Our final prayer request is very general. We know that welcoming a new baby to our house is going to be a joyful occasion, but in all honesty this enters us into a scary time, one full of intense emotions, fears of potential loss, memories of Elyse, and so much more. We can't help but think that this first year with our new little guy will be extremely challenging in so many ways. We must be desperately dependent upon the Lord. We must seek him everyday. We must put our fears into His hands. But obviously all these things can't be done on our own strength. So we ask you to simply pray for God's peace to rest on this family in a very clear way.</span></li>
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Thank you friends for supporting, loving, and walking with us through the last 19 months. You will never know how much you mean to us and how grateful we are for you taking us before Christ in every step of this journey. We are blessed beyond belief.</span></div>
Cliff Careyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01760846253223848519noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8499680519654992581.post-35685001484532670722011-03-12T09:07:00.000-08:002011-03-12T09:07:40.886-08:00Elyse's 2nd BirthdayElyse's 2nd birthday is coming up on the 27th. So hard to believe. Lots of great memories and lots of wondering: What would she be like? How much trouble would she be getting into? How much different would she be than her brother at 2?<br />
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So how will we celebrate her 2nd birthday you ask...? By running a Half-Marathon and going to Disneyland of course!<br />
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We'll head south and on Saturday the 26th I'm running in <a href="http://www.greatraceofagoura.com/">The Great Race of Agoura</a>, a really cool and slightly challenging trail run through the foothills of the Conejo Valley in Southern California. Running has become somewhat of a refuge over the last year. It provides me time outside to be alone with God, work out my frustrations and actually stay in shape rather than sit at home and eat my way to oblivion. This will be the 3rd Half Marathon for me since we lost Elyse, and each one is run in honor of her. (You can see my progress and even track me live during the race <a href="http://runkeeper.com/user/cliffcarey">here</a>.)<br />
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If I'm still able to function after 13.1 miles, we'll spend Sunday (her birthday) at Disneyland, enjoying our time as a family, and doing our annual balloon release at 1:06pm, the time of her birth. We're anticipating a quality time filled with joy and laughter, as well as the tears of missing our little girl and definitely wishing she was with us to enjoy the day.<br />
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(As a side note, if any of our So Cal friends have connections for Disneyland passes, we would be so grateful for the help.)<br />
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All in all, as we look toward March 27, we definitely hurt, yet we look forward with hope. It is so hard to see that 2nd birthday coming and to miss all of our dreams and hopes for our little girl, yet the hope we have in heaven truly does overshadow it. We know she is held by Jesus. We know she is in perfection and without any kind of hurt or pain. We know she is glorified and even more beautiful than she was on this earth (and she really was beautiful on this earth.) And ultimately, we know that she's been saved by a sovereign God that loves and cares for us, who provides every need we have for every day. He has given us the strength to move forward and has carried us through the hardest of times in life. He sustains. He loves. He cares. HE IS GOOD!Cliff Careyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01760846253223848519noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8499680519654992581.post-35149469341086398132011-02-12T12:12:00.000-08:002011-02-12T12:12:19.245-08:00One YearThis coming Tuesday, February 15, marks the 1 year point. One year ago our little girl departed the confines of this earth to live in eternity with Jesus; to live in a world with no pain or tears. We hate the fact that she isn't with us any more, yet treasure the fact that she knows her Savior intimately now.<br />
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So much has happened in the last year that it's impossible to put it all into words. So many different emotions. So much pain. So much grief. So much healing. So much joy. So much...<br />
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Our lives are changed forever. We're part of an elite club now, a club no one ever desires to join, yet one that's full of the deepest pain and some of the deepest riches known.<br />
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So what are my reflections at one year???<br />
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<b>God remains good, faithful and sovereign.</b> I've used those words over and over, yet they ring as true today as they did on February 14, 2009. <br />
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<b>We grieve the loss of our daughter each and every day.</b> One year does not make us grieve her loss any more or less. It's still the new normal that we live under every day. The pain eases and the tears become farther apart, yet we are acutely aware of the fact that a major part of us will always be missing.<br />
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<b>My specific grief at the one year mark tends to center more around the event rather than the loss.</b> Lately I have been having many flashbacks to the trauma of that day, and the days immediately following. These are very difficult and painful memories that are permanently ingrained on me.<br />
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<b>I praise God for my wife.</b> April is the most amazing woman on this earth and I am so grateful to be married to her and to have her to walk with down this rough road. I can't even begin to describe how thankful I am for the strength of our marriage and God's hand on us as a couple in this last year.<br />
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<b>God has His hands on Peter's life.</b> A year ago many people took our son on as their specific prayer project. I praise God for how He's carried Peter through this year. Peter has no memories that we know of from the trauma of the day. He remembers her, talks about her often, even prays for her. He still considers her part of the family and many nights kisses her picture goodnight. We ask him regularly where his sis is, and his response is a quick, "She's in heaven with Jesus." There are many times that April and I are sad and it's obvious to him. He will soften his voice and the conversation goes something like this: <br />
<div style="text-align: center;"><i>Peter: "Daddy, are you sad?"</i></div><div style="text-align: center;"><i>Me: "Yes Peter."</i></div><div style="text-align: center;"><i>Peter: "Daddy, you crying? You miss Sis?" </i></div><div style="text-align: center;"><i>Me: "Yes Peter"</i></div><div style="text-align: center;"><i>Peter: "I miss Sis too."</i></div>We prayed throughout the pregnancy with Elyse that she and Peter would have a special life-long bond. We truly believe God answered those prayers and continues to answer them to this day. He will always have a special place in his heart for her.<br />
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<b>I'm utterly dependent on God.</b> Throughout this year it's become painfully apparent that I just can't survive outside of His strength. His power is truly made perfect in my weakness. Before Elyse left us, I was able to get by on my own strength a lot of the time. While in word I testified of my need for Christ everyday, I don't know that my heart really sensed it. Today I can say with all integrity that without Him I am nothing. I desperately need Him!<br />
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<b>There are some great practical ways to grieve loss.</b><br />
1. <i>Advice we got shortly after Elyse died was to "be kind to yourselves."</i> Translated: Don't feel like you need to live up to anyone's expectations. Don't feel like you need to please anyone. Be honest in your grief.<br />
2. <i>Exercise. Exercise. Exercise.</i> In the days and weeks after she was gone, we walked almost every day, if not every other. It became a lifeblood for us. We were able to enjoy fresh air, get perspective, talk and cry together, yell at God if need be, and just burn off frustration. This ultimately resulted in both of us running a Half Marathon last June in San Diego.<br />
3. <i>Sleep... but not too much.</i> Grief exhausts you and we learned that quickly. Sleep was so necessary to get us from one day to the next.<br />
4. <i>Don't stop functioning.</i> We had to keep getting up every day and moving forward. We still had a son to raise and couldn't give up on him. We both look back at Peter as being a crucial part of our healing in the last year. He kept us unified and focused on the need to be functional parents raising him in a functional home.<br />
5. <i>Counseling is a very good thing.</i> Three different sessions with a professional counselor were invaluable in keeping us moving in the right direction. And it wasn't bad for our marriage either. ;)<br />
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There is so much more I could say, but let me sum things up by saying that God is good. He is faithful. He is strong. He is sovereign. And nothing I can say or do and nothing that happens to me will change that truth.<br />
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For the one year anniversary, we'll be spending Sunday afternoon with April's amazing family and then will be heading to the coast for 3 days with some great friends who have helped carry us through this year.<br />
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And to all of you that have continued to follow us, encourage us and lift us up before the Lord, we are humbled and simply say thank you. You have carried the paralytic, dug through the roof and placed him in the presence of Jesus to be healed.<br />
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<div style="text-align: center;"><b><i>"And hope does not disappoint us, because God has poured out His love into our hearts by the Holy spirit, whom He has given us." -- Romans 5:5</i></b></div>Cliff Careyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01760846253223848519noreply@blogger.com7tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8499680519654992581.post-17855866356090121512011-01-16T10:08:00.000-08:002011-01-16T10:08:15.569-08:00Job 19:25-27<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Charis SIL', charis, Verdana, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 16px;"><sup class="versenum" id="en-NIV-13323" style="font-size: 0.65em; font-weight: bold; line-height: normal; vertical-align: text-top;">25</sup></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Charis SIL', charis, Verdana, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 16px;"> </span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Charis SIL', charis, Verdana, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 16px;">I know that my redeemer</span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Charis SIL', charis, Verdana, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 16px;"> </span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Charis SIL', charis, Verdana, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 16px;">lives,</span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Charis SIL', charis, Verdana, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 16px;"> </span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Charis SIL', charis, Verdana, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 16px;"><br />
</span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Charis SIL', charis, Verdana, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 16px;"> and that in the end he will stand on the earth.</span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Charis SIL', charis, Verdana, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 16px;"><br />
</span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Charis SIL', charis, Verdana, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 16px;"><sup class="versenum" id="en-NIV-13324" style="font-size: 0.65em; font-weight: bold; line-height: normal; vertical-align: text-top;">26</sup></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Charis SIL', charis, Verdana, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 16px;"> </span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Charis SIL', charis, Verdana, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 16px;">And after my skin has been destroyed,</span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Charis SIL', charis, Verdana, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 16px;"> </span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Charis SIL', charis, Verdana, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 16px;"><br />
</span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Charis SIL', charis, Verdana, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 16px;"> yet</span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Charis SIL', charis, Verdana, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 16px;"> </span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Charis SIL', charis, Verdana, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 16px;">in</span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Charis SIL', charis, Verdana, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 16px;"> </span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Charis SIL', charis, Verdana, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 16px;">my flesh I will see God;</span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Charis SIL', charis, Verdana, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 16px;"> </span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Charis SIL', charis, Verdana, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 16px;"><br />
</span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Charis SIL', charis, Verdana, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 16px;"><sup class="versenum" id="en-NIV-13325" style="font-size: 0.65em; font-weight: bold; line-height: normal; vertical-align: text-top;">27</sup></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Charis SIL', charis, Verdana, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 16px;"> </span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Charis SIL', charis, Verdana, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 16px;">I myself will see him</span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Charis SIL', charis, Verdana, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 16px;"> </span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Charis SIL', charis, Verdana, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 16px;"><br />
</span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Charis SIL', charis, Verdana, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 16px;"> with my own eyes—I, and not another.</span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Charis SIL', charis, Verdana, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 16px;"> </span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Charis SIL', charis, Verdana, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 16px;"><br />
</span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Charis SIL', charis, Verdana, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 16px;"> How my heart yearns within me!</span>Cliff Careyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01760846253223848519noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8499680519654992581.post-76237000741117843452011-01-07T16:30:00.000-08:002011-01-07T16:43:40.588-08:00January 6 - Another MonumentJanuary 6 - Elyse has now been gone the same amount of time that she was with us. This is a difficult monument in the entire process. In my eyes it's symbolic of the fact that time just keeps passing and that my memories of my little girl just become more and more distant. Of course we do everything possible to keep those memories close, but time does indeed keep ticking away.<br />
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</div><div>My beautiful wife wrote the most painful, honest and straight-forward account on her <a href="http://anaprilday.blogspot.com/">blog</a> yesterday. She really captured the heart of where we are in this entire process. </div><div><br />
</div><div>Here are a couple more thoughts from me...</div><div><ol><li><b>This stinks!</b> - There's no way around it. This is the hardest, ugliest, most painful experience I've ever gone through. No amount of comfort, encouragement, books, videos, sermons, etc. can remove the pain.</li>
<li><b>God did not promise me an easy life!</b> - The more I study scripture and the more I've experienced life this past year, the more I've learned the simple truth that LIFE IS HARD and TRIALS WILL COME! We're called to endure, persevere, and to never give up.</li>
<li><b>The consequences of giving up are much worse than the pain of endurance. </b> Giving up would be the most selfish thing I could ever do. It would mean withdrawing from life and becoming a selfish jerk. I have the most amazing wife and son whom I've been called to love and care for. God has me in the position of husband and father to care for them. I will not give up on God and I will not give up on them!</li>
<li><b>God has met me in the pain!</b> - No doubt. Read back in my blog to the Spring and those stories of how God has faithfully reminded me of His presence continue to this day.</li>
<li><b>There IS hope for the future.</b> - In the process of not giving up I'm learning to know that as time passes, signs of God's redemption emerge. They're small at times, but they are there, and provide hope.</li>
<li><b>I can't wait for heaven. </b>- I've never longed for heaven as much as I do now. It truly is a blessed hope that allows me to endure. I can't wait for that day where I get to meet my Savior and be reunited with my little girl. Maybe she'll show me around a bit. How will she be different? How will she be the same? So many questions answered in that ultimate day of redemption!</li>
<li><b>God continues to use Elyse's life and death to draw people to Him.</b> - I've taken just about every opportunity to share with groups the goodness, faithfulness and sovereignty of our Lord through this entire process. In March, a group of students in the Joshua Wilderness Institute. In April, a group of about 50 youth pastors. In May, our Hume Staff in a Staff Chapel service. In October to Missionary Kids in Papua New Guinea. And finally this past November, I got to speak to several hundred high school and junior high students at a Christian school. Every time I've spoken, it's been a privilege to share the truth of God's love in the midst of living in a painful world.</li>
</ol><div>There's so much more I could share, but I'll save it for another time. Suffice it to say that we continue to value the prayers of so many friends, and so many others that we've never even met. The Family of God has been exceptional through this entire process and we are eternally grateful. No matter what, HE IS ALWAYS GOOD!</div></div><div><br />
</div>Cliff Careyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01760846253223848519noreply@blogger.com5tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8499680519654992581.post-75873543489779687252010-12-08T22:21:00.000-08:002010-12-08T22:21:19.108-08:00The Holidays are Upon UsAs Christmas approaches, so many have been super sensitive with us to the fact that this time of the year is just plain difficult. A few weeks ago we went to the Hume Family Thanksgiving Dinner. To state it simply, it was miserable. So many families, kids running around, just happy as can be. And we were left with memories of being in that spot a year ago, holding Elyse and watching Peter run around and play with the other kids. Memories of the incredible joy that comes with the holiday season.<br />
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As we are in the midst of this year's holidays, it's a different kind of joy. Not a joy based on our circumstances, but a joy because of who Christ is and the grace and redemption that only He can bring. I don't know that I've ever been more dependent on Him than I am right now. I've always talked of dependence, but this year I'm living it out. I desperately need Him.<br />
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Over the next 4 months, I'm asking those of you who have been faithfully praying for us to please consider the following dates and to continue to lift up our family.<br />
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<ul><li>The 15th of each month. December will be 10 months since Elyse left us and it almost seems like yesterday. Time takes away the intensity of the pain, but the pain remains nonetheless.</li>
<li>December 25 - We have the most wonderful memories of Elyse's first Christmas last year and the wonder that was in her eyes the whole day. It's painful to know that day's coming and that we don't get to see it in person this year, or for any future year while we're on this earth.</li>
<li>The 27th of each month - She'd be 21 months old in December. We try to imagine what stage she'd be in, remembering how fun each of those stages was with Peter.)</li>
<li>January 6 - She will have been away from us the same amount of time she was with us... a painful mark to hit, but one that reminds us that this is indeed permanent.</li>
<li>February 15 - One year since she left us.</li>
<li>March 27 - Her 2nd Birthday</li>
</ul><div>We know that so many have been faithful to carry us to the Lord, much as the paralytic's friends brought him to Jesus to be healed. We're confident that the healing and redemption will come someday. While maybe not on this earth, we know it will come.</div>Cliff Careyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01760846253223848519noreply@blogger.com5tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8499680519654992581.post-72022574730230101962010-11-02T02:06:00.000-07:002010-11-02T02:19:06.168-07:005 Months of Silence<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: small;">It's been a quiet 5 months on this blog, not to imply that nothing's happening in the Carey Family, but to say that I've been having a tough time forming words to truly express my heart.</span></span><br />
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: small;">The big question... How are Cliff, April and Peter doing? The short answer... okay! The long answer... this is a long, hard and winding road, filled with a lot of pot holes, and the occasional stretches of solid pavement.</span></span><br />
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: small;">We've adapted and come to accept our lives in this "new normal." It doesn't mean we like it, but we've accepted it. It's our cross to bear and one that we carry only with the strength and love of our Lord Jesus. We depend on Him for everything and are learning to thank Him for the most simple things, for the fact that He gives us shelter, food, family, friends, and the grace to endure through the most challenging times. </span></span><br />
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: small;">In 2 Corinthians 12, Paul laments the thorn in his flesh and his continual pleading with the Lord to take it away. Three times he prayed. (300 times I've prayed.) Yet Paul was willing to accept God's answer, "<b><i>My grace is sufficient for you for my power is made perfect in weakness." Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses so that Christ's power may rest on me. That is why, for Christ's sake, I delight in weaknesses, in insults, in hardships, in persecutions, in difficulties. For when I am weak then I am strong. </i></b> I've studied and taught this passage for over 13 years and it's never been so personal as it is today. I've begged God to take this pain away over and over, yet He continually returns with His answer, "Cliff, my grace is sufficient for you."</span></span><br />
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: small;">A week ago I was in Papua New Guinea, having returned there for the fourth time with Hume to run camps for Missionary Kids. (<a href="http://www.facebook.com/album.php?aid=558280&l=0bd5594f7d&id=701450054">See the pictures.</a>) Several months ago the leader of the trip asked me to be the main speaker for the two camps. I accepted the invitation, scared more than I've ever been by a speaking engagement. First off, I haven't spoken to a group of teens in years. Second, what do I have to offer? Do I share our story of pain and grief? Will high school students even care? Will it impact them?</span></span><br />
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: small;">The message we took them was 2 Corinthians 5:14-15 - </span></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: small;"><b><i>For Christ’s love compels us, because we are convinced that one died for all, and therefore all died.</i></b></span></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: small;"><b><i> </i></b></span></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: small;"><b><i>And he died for all, that those who live should no longer live for themselves but for him who died for them and was raised again</i></b>. It was through the grace of God that I was able to share the power of living our lives not for ourselves, but for our Lord Jesus Christ, and that it was only through dying to self that we could truly live for God. In that is also a message of brokenness that leads to an unmistakable dependence on our Lord.</span></span><br />
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: small;">On our final night in PNG, one of the high school students shared with me the following, "I know you were nervous about sharing the story of your daughter's death, and whether it would mean anything to us; but you need to know that it seriously affected me. I was in tears. Your story impacted my life."</span></span><br />
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: small;">All I can do is praise God and thank Him. His power is indeed made perfect through our weakness.</span></span>Cliff Careyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01760846253223848519noreply@blogger.com3